Put a Sock in it….


It’s been a mystery ever since cavemen first went down to the local stream to wash their favourite leather feet wraps. Painstakingly pounding them against the rocks using the latest brand of non-bio washing powder, drying them over open fires, only to find a couple of days later that one had gone missing.
Thousands of years later, and it appears that I too have fallen victim of this phenomenon. A spot check on my sock drawer revealed that from a possible 23 pairs of socks, there were only 7 usable pairs. 15 socks were missing a partner. These are bad statistics in anybodies book. If I asked anyone that might of handled socks after being removed from my feet as a pair, if they knew where the partner was to the solitary knitwear, the reply is consistently one of denial. I have tried to analyse this through each stage. The first area of suspicion is the linen basket; perhaps the odd sock was left behind, skulking about in the bottom? Not so, I’ve checked, nothing there. Next up the washing machine; is it trapped somewhere in the drum, nope; Is it the soap powder? Doubtful, other items would suffer from any form of corrosion as well. Is it the water? Again, everything would suffer the same fate. Next up, the washing line; surely this is the place that highlights the missing items. Apparently not, the discovery is only made when a selection is made to be worn. At the moment there appears to be no logical solution to the problem. I am beginning to think that there are greater forces at work here. The theory that washing machine manufacturers are in league with knitwear companies to boost sock sales, I find that a little far fetched. How does the machine know to leave the one sock?
Whilst conducting this investigation, I have encountered a possible source or should I say cause to the demise of the pairings. Apparently it is still fashionable to wear odd socks and I have a daughter whose duty it is to be fashionable. A covert extraction took place from the conflict zone of my daughters’ bedroom and two lost souls have been reunited. But this still leaves many unaccounted for, my quest continues…..

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